A few years ago, I was facing an unimaginable loss. For a while, I forgot who I was. Losing my young brother, my only sibling, resulted in me losing a huge piece of my heart. I forgot how to laugh - genuinely laugh, and I forgot how to smile - genuinely smile.
It felt like I only knew how to cry.
My bubbly, carefree, 12 year old spirit was gone. However, I decided to hide behind a mask. This mask was made of materials called happiness and joy, materials that I just couldn't afford at the time. I was my parent's only child now. I had to be strong - I owed it to them.
That was in Year 8.
In Year 9, that same year, I recovered a bit. I started to laugh more and found beauty in the little things. But something was still missing - I could feel it, but I decided to ignore it and move on.
In Year 10, I started drifting away from the friends I previosuly hung out with and joined a new group. I'm friends with and kind to everyone in my grade, so the transisition came very easily.
It was the best decision that I have ever made.
These people that I started to eat lunch with are absolutely beautiful;they're honestly a gift from God. They are wise, honest, fun-loving, true to themselves, hilarious, generous and intelligent. I started to genuinely laugh; genuinely smile. The pain seemed easier to manage and the mask was no longer needed. They are responsible for some of my greatest memories; from the multiple times we went to the movies to the to the time we went to lunch and had to pay quite the bill. Whenever I'm around them, it is impossible for me to be unhappy, for they're one of the main sources of joy in my life.
Sometimes I sit and reflect on how blessed I am to have found true friends at my age, and I'm not only talking about the people that I eat lunch with. I have a few very close friends that I don't need to sit with every day to feel their companionship. I'm in Year 11 now, but I know that my I share a bond with these people that is strong enough to last a lifetime.
My friends are my loves.
My incredible, witty, talented loves.